Every time I head to the Furman track to meet my running friends for a prescribed track workout on Tuesdays, I always have a sliver of doubt and nervousness in the pit of my stomach. "What if I don't hit my goals?", "What if I want to quit?", "What if I slow down too much?". Here's the thing- it's not easy and it won't always go the way I want it to-period. Letting go of the control and trusting in your fitness is the hardest part. Also, learning to accept the shitty workouts and keep moving forward is the only way we grow.
Workouts still make me anxious. They are hard. But the hard is what makes it good. They make you better and they build character. They teach us that no matter what, we keep going. Because if we let a bad workout tear us down to the point of giving up, it just kills our self esteem. That starts a vicious cycle of negative self talk and that prevents us from reaching goals and staying motivated.
I've had my fair share of disappointments in the past. A major stress fracture that prevented me from running Boston '16, some crappy races where I didn't hit my goals, and some moments of major self doubt. What I've learned through all of it, is that I have to just keep moving forward and with a positive outlook. As many times as I have been heart broken, I've also had so many moments of joy and satisfaction. I remind myself that the focus has to be on what I can do, not what I can't. And also, some outside factors that I can't always control.
Whether you are struggling to eat cleaner, hoping to make it through that boot camp class without leaving in the middle of it, or trying to BQ that marathon again for the 5th time-remember that you CAN do it and you WILL do it. You are capable and you are strong. Pick yourself back up after a bad day of eating and do better the next day. Add on an extra 5 minutes to that boot camp class each week until you've made it the full hour. Give yourself grace and make new goals for a new marathon so you can get that BQ that you deserve. Everything comes in time. Be patient and keep moving forward. You've got this!
"If it doesn't challenge you, it won't change you."-Fred Devito